⭐ Co‑Regulation: Why It Matters in Dog Training

Co‑regulation is one of those concepts that sounds a bit “woo‑woo” at first… until you realise you’ve been experiencing it your whole life. And your dog has too.

At its core, co‑regulation is the idea that emotion is energy in motion — and that energy can be transferred between beings who are close to each other. Humans do it. Dogs do it. All mammals do it. And once you understand it, dog training suddenly makes a lot more sense.

🌡️ You Already Know What Co‑Regulation Feels Like

Imagine you’re sitting in a dentist’s waiting room. Someone walks in who is super nervous — fiddling with their hair, tapping their foot, breathing quickly. Without even thinking, you might look up, shift in your seat, or feel your own chest tighten slightly.

Now imagine someone calm walks in, sits quietly, and scrolls on their phone. You barely notice them.

This is co‑regulation in action. A busy or dysregulated nervous system creates a ripple effect. Your body picks up on it and prepares to assess the situation for potential threats. A calm nervous system, on the other hand, can help bring your system back down into rest‑and‑digest.

It works both ways.

And it doesn’t just happen between humans — it happens between humans and dogs too.

🌿 Nature, Animals, and the Power of Calm

A regulated nervous system can calm a dysregulated one. This is why:

• People feel calmer in nature 🌳

• Talking to a grounded friend helps you settle 🤝

• Cuddling your favourite pet slows your breathing 🐶

Hildi does this beautifully in her therapy dog work — offering co‑regulation to children in schools and refuges. Dogs can be anchors of calm… but they also absorb our energy.

Which brings us to training.

🐕 So… How Does This Apply to Dog Training?

Often, a situation with a dog winds us up — and life piles on top — and suddenly we are dysregulated. Maybe we see a cat belonging to our least‑favourite neighbour 🙄🐈. Maybe a deer appears and we’re hit with FENTON‑style flashbacks 🦌😱.

Our nervous system spikes. And our dogs feel it.

We become reactive, so they become reactive.

This doesn’t mean it’s your fault. And it doesn’t mean you need to float through life like Buddha — serene, detached, and unbothered by anything (you might be the best dog trainer ever, but you’d probably be a bit of an arsehole too 😂).

But it does invite awareness.

🧘‍♀️ Ground Yourself First — Then Help Your Dog

When you’re handling your dog, ask yourself:

• Can I take a few slow breaths? 🌬️

• Can I notice what I can see, hear, smell and touch to bring myself back into my body? 👁️👂👃✋

• Can I get my own nervous system online before asking my dog to regulate theirs?

• Can I take care of myself so I’m not pouring from an empty cup? ☕💛

I work on this constantly. Sometimes I realise it’s been weeks since I’ve seen my parasympathetic nervous system — usually when I’m swearing at an inanimate object because a spice jar has dared to hide at the back of the cupboard 🤬🫙.

We’re all human. But awareness changes everything.

💛 What Helps You Regulate?

Everyone has their own ways of grounding themselves. Mine include:

• A rage‑clean of the house 🧹🔥

• A run 🏃‍♀️

• Time with horses 🐴

• Reiki naps on the sofa with Hildi 💤🐶

What helps you come back to centre?

If you’d like to explore how co‑regulation can transform your training, your walks, and your dog’s behaviour, you can reach out any time. Work on calmness